The April 2001 Lawrence Summers Memorial Award* goes to the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office (PTO), Smucker's and an affiliated company, Menusaver.

PTO awarded a patent to Menusaver for crustless peanut butter-and-jelly sandwiches in December 1999. Smucker's and Menusaver are now seeking to enforce its patent for a "sealed crustless sandwich" against a small Michigan company, Albie's Foods.

"We have a product which is a crustless peanut butter-and-jelly sandwich," a Smucker's spokesperson told Reuters. "We feel they have infringed the patent."

The patent abstract says:

"The sandwich includes a lower bread portion, an upper bread portion, an upper filling and a lower filling between the lower and upper bread portions, a center filling sealed between the upper and lower fillings, and a crimped edge along an outer perimeter of the bread portions for sealing the fillings there between. The upper and lower fillings are preferably comprised of peanut butter and the center filling is comprised of at least jelly. The center filling is prevented from radiating outwardly into and through the bread portions from the surrounding peanut butter."

That's patent speak for a peanut butter-and-jelly sandwich with crimped edges.

Reminding readers that legitimate patents must meet a test of non-obviousness, Greg Aharonian of Internet Patent News Service writes, "Take two pie dough sheets, stuff them with jelly, crimp the edges, and bake a pie. Utterly obvious. Take two pieces of bread, cut off the crusts, fill it with peanut butter and jelly, and crimp the edges. Utterly obvious everywhere, in this universe, all of the parallel universes, a metauniversal volume infinite in size as a domain of obviousness, EXCEPT FOR THOSE UNIVERSES WITH CRYSTAL CITIES HOUSING PATENT OFFICES." The PTO is in Crystal City, Virginia.

Source: "Smucker Protects Peanut Butter-Jelly Sandwich Patent," David Lawsky, Reuters, January 25, 2001.